Kaus

I don't know why I keep acting so depressed around people. I mean, it's not as if it's something I have a great deal of control over - people sometimes don't seem to grasp that it's not something I can flip on or off like a switch - but when it does happen, why do I keep trying to force it on other people? There's no cause for that. It doesn't make me feel any better and it only causes them to get depressed themselves, or worried about me, or just lose their patience with me. I should really just shut up until I'm better.

And now, a few things about Amanda Palmer's solo album. Just because.
Now, judging each song by its own merits, it's still an incredible album. I think there's no doubt that some of her best work so far is here. But the whole way through a few things just niggled at me.

1. The tracks were unbalanced.
In the past her albums have been a good mix of fast and slow, happy and sad, with all sorts of tones and themes mixed in. In this case I didn't feel that. It felt choppy, with not nearly enough flow between tracks, and too many slower-paced songs that the uppity "Oasis" near the end couldn't save.

2. Those segments at the ends of songs with the long pauses and quiet voices.
So sometimes it's effective, and sometimes it's not, and say what you like I think it does nothing for the album overall.

3. No Brian Viglione.
I know it's a solo album, but I've always thought that any of her songs that didn't feature him playing alongside her were lacking something. The Dresden Dolls have always worked best in harmony. I think he doesn't get nearly as much respect and appreciation as he deserves.

4. Overly orchestral.
I'm not saying that being orchestral is a bad thing; in some cases a song couldn't have survived without it. It's just that part of the allure of the Dresden Dolls was the way that they could create something absolutely incredible using only a keyboard, drums and some incredible vocals. ("Sex Changes" springs to mind.) After that a fully orchestral album just feels over the top and unnecessary. The only instruments that I think have ever worked well with them are the strings, such as in "Runs in the Family" and that creepy version of "Missed Me" with the violin.

Now, what was point number 5... khe. I'm sure it will come back to me. I still love the album. The knowledge that I'll never top Amanda Palmer is what keeps me struggling to try.

I feel tired. Not physically tired, just exhausted all the way through. It's getting harder to hold my head up. Oh, how I long for solace... to be in the arms of my love. To finally find a happy place. To dream when I'm asleep but stop dreaming when I'm awake.