Aug 8, 2008
Aug 3, 2008
Can't stay mad at me forever
First off, a quick review of the fourth Mummy movie (although personally I think it should be called the third, since The Scorpion King was in fact telling a virtually unrelated story and should be considered a spinoff as opposed to part of the main series, but whatever) which I saw two days ago. It was... mediocre.
First off, the acting? Bad. The old characters obviously have no interest in this movie, while the new ones seem to have little or no talent whatsoever. It's generally agreed that the new Evie has no place in this movie and should have been killed off sometime earlier. Speaking of Evie, her relationship with her husband is monotonous and completely without chemistry. The same can be said for the pointless romantic subplot between the now inappropriately loud and clueless Alex and the gratuitous stock chinese girl. (Another complaint has been that he lost his english accent, but I personally found both versions of him to be annoying. Maybe it's just me.)
The movie starts off well with a fairly well-done segment of backstory, cutting to an idyllic scene of fly-fishing. It's a good start. It's also memorable as the only part of the film that's well-paced. Sadly it goes on this vein for much too long, dragging a peaceful image of retirement on for far too long. Yes, they're retired, and they're happy. We get it. Move on. Finally they do, only to shove more exposition down our throats. Then without warning we cut to a poorly-done action sequence.
The entire film goes on like this; scenes of romantic subplot totally without chemistry, clumsy expositional dialogue, and claustrophobic action sequences with far too many close-ups. Within a few minutes you'll be begging for a wide-angle shot. All of the above are far too long. This goes on for some time.
The plot is convoluted and unnecessary. It's a movie that tries very, very hard to be epic, which leads to throwing absolutely everything into it regardless of whether it's relevant or even makes any sense. The yetis, for instance, could easily have been left out. As could Jonathan, who makes no actual contributions to the plot and serves only as a poor comic relief. In fact, the entire "pool of immortality" storyline could and should have been cut out. We know right from the beginning that they're going to fail to stop the Emperor from reaching it, so there's really no point to that segment of the story at all. We feel no dramatic tension; in fact, we don't even care. The audience wishes they would just get to the point. On the other hand, the likable mad pilot thrown in more as a plot device than anything else gets no story whatsoever. The evil soldiers who resurrect the Emperor get no character motivation past being fascists. If they'd just stopped trying to cram everything in and just build on the good elements that they have... well.
What I couldn't help but notice was the tendency to rip off other movies, namely Indiana Jones. If the crystal lighting the way to the [insert valuable thing here] wasn't a giveaway already, there's also the father-being-almost-killed-and-only-the-[insert valuable thing here]-can-save-him twist. That and aside from the colour of their skin the evil chinese soldiers were indistinguishable from Nazis. Change the uniform and no one would have noticed. I'd go on, but seriously, I'm sick of this review. It can't even continue on properly from the previous Mummy films, because apart from reusing characters it has next to no continuity whatsoever.
Despite all the terrible things I've just said about it, the movie wasn't bad. Hole-ridden plot and poor acting aside, it was still enjoyable. Some parts were not as good as others, but there was nothing in it that I genuinely hated. Many thought the end was anticlimactic but you know what? I liked it. Say what you will, for all its faults Tomb of the Dragon Emperor is still a likable action film that I don't regret seeing. Three out of five stars.
...that went on a bit longer than expected.
We went to the Buskers Festival today. Lots of street performers doing acts that can't be done by anyone else in the world, all of which seem to involve balancing and juggling. One person juggled an apple, a knife and a flaming torch balanced on the shaft of a bicycle on top of a pole, another (who looked alarmingly like BenLoka, that Youtube guy) juggled a hat, a plunger and a rubber chicken while balanced on top of a ladder, one guy juggled three knives blindfolded while spinning around on top of an absurdly tall unicycle, and one guy balanced a whirling lawnmower on his chin while people threw lettuce into it. You have to question how people discover that they have these talents.
I've started writing the story of my life. It's august. I have to be prepared for december. Perhaps if I focus on the past I won't have to worry about the future. I've never been to good at living in the present... to be honest, I don't entirely understand the concept.
First off, the acting? Bad. The old characters obviously have no interest in this movie, while the new ones seem to have little or no talent whatsoever. It's generally agreed that the new Evie has no place in this movie and should have been killed off sometime earlier. Speaking of Evie, her relationship with her husband is monotonous and completely without chemistry. The same can be said for the pointless romantic subplot between the now inappropriately loud and clueless Alex and the gratuitous stock chinese girl. (Another complaint has been that he lost his english accent, but I personally found both versions of him to be annoying. Maybe it's just me.)
The movie starts off well with a fairly well-done segment of backstory, cutting to an idyllic scene of fly-fishing. It's a good start. It's also memorable as the only part of the film that's well-paced. Sadly it goes on this vein for much too long, dragging a peaceful image of retirement on for far too long. Yes, they're retired, and they're happy. We get it. Move on. Finally they do, only to shove more exposition down our throats. Then without warning we cut to a poorly-done action sequence.
The entire film goes on like this; scenes of romantic subplot totally without chemistry, clumsy expositional dialogue, and claustrophobic action sequences with far too many close-ups. Within a few minutes you'll be begging for a wide-angle shot. All of the above are far too long. This goes on for some time.
The plot is convoluted and unnecessary. It's a movie that tries very, very hard to be epic, which leads to throwing absolutely everything into it regardless of whether it's relevant or even makes any sense. The yetis, for instance, could easily have been left out. As could Jonathan, who makes no actual contributions to the plot and serves only as a poor comic relief. In fact, the entire "pool of immortality" storyline could and should have been cut out. We know right from the beginning that they're going to fail to stop the Emperor from reaching it, so there's really no point to that segment of the story at all. We feel no dramatic tension; in fact, we don't even care. The audience wishes they would just get to the point. On the other hand, the likable mad pilot thrown in more as a plot device than anything else gets no story whatsoever. The evil soldiers who resurrect the Emperor get no character motivation past being fascists. If they'd just stopped trying to cram everything in and just build on the good elements that they have... well.
What I couldn't help but notice was the tendency to rip off other movies, namely Indiana Jones. If the crystal lighting the way to the [insert valuable thing here] wasn't a giveaway already, there's also the father-being-almost-killed-and-only-the-[insert valuable thing here]-can-save-him twist. That and aside from the colour of their skin the evil chinese soldiers were indistinguishable from Nazis. Change the uniform and no one would have noticed. I'd go on, but seriously, I'm sick of this review. It can't even continue on properly from the previous Mummy films, because apart from reusing characters it has next to no continuity whatsoever.
Despite all the terrible things I've just said about it, the movie wasn't bad. Hole-ridden plot and poor acting aside, it was still enjoyable. Some parts were not as good as others, but there was nothing in it that I genuinely hated. Many thought the end was anticlimactic but you know what? I liked it. Say what you will, for all its faults Tomb of the Dragon Emperor is still a likable action film that I don't regret seeing. Three out of five stars.
...that went on a bit longer than expected.
We went to the Buskers Festival today. Lots of street performers doing acts that can't be done by anyone else in the world, all of which seem to involve balancing and juggling. One person juggled an apple, a knife and a flaming torch balanced on the shaft of a bicycle on top of a pole, another (who looked alarmingly like BenLoka, that Youtube guy) juggled a hat, a plunger and a rubber chicken while balanced on top of a ladder, one guy juggled three knives blindfolded while spinning around on top of an absurdly tall unicycle, and one guy balanced a whirling lawnmower on his chin while people threw lettuce into it. You have to question how people discover that they have these talents.
I've started writing the story of my life. It's august. I have to be prepared for december. Perhaps if I focus on the past I won't have to worry about the future. I've never been to good at living in the present... to be honest, I don't entirely understand the concept.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)