Unconditional

I've got big plans for this blog.
I don't care that I haven't updated in, I don't know, a month. That's not important. I know, it's the new year already, and my girlfriend is sixteen now, and I've had an exam, etc etc, and yeah a lot has happened. I know I've been seriously neglecting this blog beyond belief lately. I'm fully aware of that. But that doesn't mean I don't have plans for it. See, one of my potential plans for the future now is to become a critic. A critic of what, you ask? I don't know. I'll think of something. But in the meantime, this blog will become my little spot to exercise my criticizing skills. I don't know the word for it - a critique blog? Anyway. Whenever I can be bothered to post something I will critique anything I can think of to go with it. Maybe I'll get some actual readers.

My polar bear. My J. My J-bear. And she's tired. As am I... I'm just better at hiding it. I think.

Tell me this. Have you ever had a musical orgasm? Sort of like that thing from A Clockwork Orange, yeah. This one gets me every time. I'll never understand exactly why.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MmYSy9U78Sc
Yes, I am a secret Final Fantasy freak. Shut up.

My faults: Arrogant. Selfish. Overconfident. Self-obsessed. Uncaring.
My qualities: Um... still working on this.

Random Youtube video, just because I feel like it:


Something I worry about sometimes. Supposing a certain person or personage was... possessed, say. By, in no certain terms, mind, some sort of demon. In this day and age, how would anyone be able to tell? It would be passed off as genuine evil, or cruelty... or insanity... some kind of disorder, maybe... Something is very wrong in this world, that such things can exist. Angels and Demons are real. There's no POINT in denying it. Yet that's exactly what we do; we come up with "scientific" explanations for events that would otherwise be called unnatural or even supernatural.

Grav: Grav is perhaps the single most difficult to translate word in my entire itinerary. It is used to stack extra stress onto another word, but also has a meaning of its own.

One White Stripe

Saw Sweeney Todd. Cha-wow. Best musical I've seen since... well, best musical I've seen. Oh, wait. Nightmare before Christmas. That one was fairly excellent too. But it's definitely up there. I think my favorite part was when they were sitting on the towel, and she's describing all the places she wants to go, and in each scene he's sitting in the exact same position with the exact same expression on his face. Made me laugh. And the part when he finally killed the judge; in my head I was screaming "Yes! Yes! Finally! Ha-haa!" and making other such merriment. It was very satisfying. I relate well to Sweeyey Todd.

And I don't know why people didn't like the ending. Just because it wasn't a "happy" ending doesn't mean it wasn't brilliant. Everyone gets what they deserve in the end. Sweeney Todd learns the cost of killing, Mrs. Lovett gets a taste of her own medicine, as it were, the kid becomes a hero by murdering ours, the judge and his beetle get most satisfyingly destroyed, and the boy - and this was the real clincher for me - gets to run off and live happily ever after with his sister. That one simple connection that turned the whole meaning of the movie around; that's what really made it for me. That's the true genius of Sweeney Todd.

Although one thing did bother me.

Those who know me well have seen me in many strange moods. Some good, some bad, some outright frightening. But this one was new... ish... blood lust. The desire to slash, to scratch, to crush, to destroy... to murder. And that got me thinking.

There's remarkable few in the world who know who I really am. And yet... they don't. Because anyone who had any concept of how dangerous I can be would run.
And yet... there are two, one in my arms, one across the city - the world to me - some part of her still longing...

I need time to think.

The ongoing saga of Heather and the Heretic

“Do you believe in the fourth dimension?”

His eyes seemed to light up as the very number passed through his lips. I swallowed nervously, mentally steeling myself. “Like, time? Well... yeah, I guess...”

He had a little laugh; he hid it well, but I had learned to recognize it. “No, not time,” he chuckled. “The fourth spatial dimension. Ana, kata, the extra directions, that sort of thing.” His hands began to shake, as they tended to when he was excited. “I've worked it out. I know how to explain it, to draw it, to map it now!”

I stayed very still for a second, thinking very carefully. “Including time, wouldn't that make five dimensions?”

The shaking stopped. “You're getting ahead of me there. I haven't worked out how to draw five yet. But look!” he exclaimed as he drew two pieces of paper out of his pockets. “Watch... and learn.”

He scurried over to the desk and picked up a pair of scissors. Very carefully he placed the papers together and cut a perfect circle out of them both. He held up one circle and grabbed a pen. “This circle,” he said, drawing a letter K on it, “is called Kghroman. This one,” he drew an M on the other, “is called Morgoth.” Finally he lay one of the papers flat on the desk and wrote a letter G, with an arrow pointing to the empty circle. “This space, which has the potential to contain either circle, is called Gomorra.”

“Why the funny names?”

For this I received a glare. “What does it matter?” He returned to the desk, placing one circle on either side of the paper. “Now. Without removing any of the above from the surface of the table, I want you to place both circles into Gomorra.”

I walked over to the table. He looked at me expectantly. Half-heartedly I began to shuffle the papers around on the desk. I could see where this was going; clearly the task was impossible. I sighed. “Look,” I said, “I don't know what you're expecting me to do here. It obviously can't be done.” I tried to push Kghroman through the paper. It began to lift. “What, have you worked out how to move papers through each other?”

With a smug look he walked over. “Of course it's impossible,” he said. “But now... watch this.” Very carefully he picked up Morgoth and placed it directly into Gomorra, then put Kghroman perfectly on top of it. He looked back up at me. “Do you see?”

I gave him a confused look. “That's cheating. You said they weren't allowed to leave the table.”

“No!” The agitation in his voice suggested I was being thick again. “That's the point. The puzzle can only be solved by adding an extra dimension. Moving from two to three is the answer. Now look.” He held the circles between his fingers and lifted the paper. “You see? The edges stick out slightly. They don't quite fit in three dimensions. But...” he put the paper down. “When you go back to two, they go back to occupying the same space. And this proves my point.

“Actually,” he went on, “the mere act of cutting out a circle proves my point. Not the circle, but the space that's left. Creating a hollow object externally – easy enough, you say, but seamlessly? To take the inside out without cutting the object open? With scissors and paper it's easy; you poke a hole and just cut. But in three dimensions? Imagine trying to forge a hollow metal sphere. Just think about it. It can't be done.

“So,” he said, “Do you see?”

I gave him my best blank stare. “Sorry? What exactly am I supposed to be seeing?”

He rolled his eyes. “All I'm saying is that by moving from 2-D to 3-D, you can move solid objects through each other and even put two in the same place. But now... let's take it up another level.” He picked up Kghroman and Morgoth and rolled them into balls between his palms. Then he put them down and clasped his hands together. “Right,” he said. “Now the space between my hands is Gomorra. It's not seamless, but you get the idea. Same puzzle as before. Place both balls into Gomorra.” I stared at the balls, then at his hands, then back at the balls. “What are you waiting for? This time you know the answer.”

New year, same world

Time to reflect upon the past year.

I've had my heart broken 1.4 times.
I've found a girlfriend, whom I love. (Though admittedly I sometimes worry about her. I guess it's my nature.)
I've "double-upgraded" to nine.
My left arm has seen a lot of abuse.
I gave myself a rude awakening about my lack of omnipotency.
I have an "imaginary friend", Jim, the spectral spectator.
I now like mango juice.
Project Rebirth.
I wrote about how selfish and unfeeling the characters of To Kill A Mockingbird are.
I've had a dog temporarily, and gained two more cats.
I've been incredibly clever and phenomenally dim-witted.
I've started a blog.
I've become addicted to Webkinz, Munchkin, and Guitar Hero.
My lizard has moved from upstairs to downstairs.
I've invented the Chinchilla Theory, the All is One Theory, the Resurrection Theory, and the Source Theory.
I've officially established myself as the Ice Angel.
I've been, I've seen, I've done, I've walked away.
All that and more. A year is certainly a very, very long time.