Timeskips

When am I?
This is very, very bad. To use another tortured analogy, the surgical wound became infected after the operation. Something inside me has been damaged. My sense of time has become horribly skewed. I'm dissociating out of control. Memories are cracking in and out of consciousness. We're losing time at an alarming rate, hours and days simply disappearing. And then there's the chronological dyslexia, events arriving in my head in slightly the wrong order.
And it hurts, it hurts so much...
the pain...
and I'm so hungry...

Aftershocks

I'm really in a lot of pain right now. My chest feels... well, not bad, considering it was ripped open recently. But still. I'm afraid to touch it now... feels like blood. My hearts are still bad, too. Even though the little monster is gone they're still going to take a long time to heal. So the long and short of it is my chest hurts, a lot. Accordingly I've been grumpy.
Still. It's been sunny lately and I've been going for walks. So maybe things will improve.

...I couldn't save her. I told myself that everything depended on my being able to save her. I've always put too much faith in people, always bet on the wrong horse...
I'll just have to live for us both, now. Me, her... and her child. They're my responsibility.